Oh, Manglu!!

Shalini Mehra

 
In tea, most of the people know me mainly through ‘The Camellia’Tea Planters’ magazine. I cherish the moments of its birth - December 2001- as it has been the most exhilarating and at the same time satisfying experience.

Personally I never took writing seriously, never thought of sending anything for publication. It was always my ‘Moody Muse’ that will surface now and then. Though a complete novice to the field of publishing, I had a very clear concept of the content, the idea that had sat dormant for years:  Real Life Tea Stories, the emphasis was to be on the personal side of Tea Planters’ lives.

The 'content division’ in various sections came as if it was sitting ready in my mind: for example story telling meant ‘Nostalgia’, but the word has very wide connotations, so it needed to have specific subdivisions. Hence several sections were created to fit various writings: 

'As it happened' (for one particular incident)

‘When I came to Tea’ (first day or initial days on arrival), 

‘Nostalgia’ for captivating stories by the raconteurs we have in tea

'Uncanny & Bizarre' (Tea boasts of quite a few haunted bungalows), 

‘Giggle in the Tea Cup' (how could a Planter or Tea memsahib live without Manglu, the bearer)

‘Little Mirchi Thoda Pepper’ (A good laugh is a must)

‘View Point’ (on a serious note) and 

‘Cuisine’ (Tea Memsahibs’ special forte)

One of the most interesting sections then was ‘Giggle in the Tea Cup’ –  anecdotes about the bungalow helpers who were so often so very simple,  naïve, some ‘dumb’ ( pardon my saying, but that breed existed) and interactions with them led to some hilarious situations.

Today the blog - Indian Chai Stories -  that GowriMohanakrishnan has created is on Facebook and has  a far wider reach, and I am so happy to share some of those anecdotes.  I am sure those who had penned these down on the pages of the magazine years back, would be reminiscing and grinning, if they happen to read them, as they are on Facebook.

Meet our man for all seasons, our Jeeves, Manglu – a name I gave this universal character in Tea.  All the situations and conversations are real.

From Anjali Behl -

Chatting over a cup of coffee with my friend I was enjoying the winter sun... she told me something really hilarious. Her old bearer was off duty for a week and on his return she wanted an explanation.

 He said, “Memsahib humara maiki ke bachha huan hai” (My wife has given birth to a child.).

 Memsahib “  Abhi kitana baccha hai? (How many children you have now?”)

 Manglu: “  panch  tho chori aur teen tho chora (five girls and three boys).”

Memsahib: “ Eight altogether?” 

Manglu:” Nahi memsahib ek, ek kar ke hua hai.” (I got them one at a time)

From Jyoti Arjuna -

Our Gooru Bagaal (Cowherd) is a simple soul. Very devoted to cows, he literally worships them. One cow has not been well for some time. My husband, a great devotee of his Guru organizes keertans (devotional song sessions) very often. One day he was sitting in the verandah when Bagaal came over.

'How is the cow now?', inquired my husband. 

Bagaal replied sadly, 'Theek nahi hai  Sahib! aap uske liye bhi prathna karana'

(not well, you should pray for her too.)

My husband very touched by his love for the animal asked him, 'Do you have any Guru'? ( spiritual teacher)

'Yes sahib do tho hai, ek boga , ek kala ( I have two one white one black' replied the Bagal.

'What?' my husband exclaimed 'Two ‘Gurus', one white and one black…. how can that be possible?'

 I came out laughing, explaining, 'What he means is he has two Goorus (Cows) one white and one black!'  

From Aditi Sharma -

Having missed my lunch one day, I felt hungry around afternoon tea time. Trying to control calories, I asked Manglu to get me a piece of toast and one poached egg.

When time went by and neither Manglu nor eggs arrived; I rang the bell. Manglu arrived looking bewildered with one toast on a plate and very sheepishly admitted:  

'Memsahib, I could not find a pocha ('rotten' in local lingo) egg. I broke four eggs; all of those were fresh.' 

Manglu, the bearer was asked by the Memsahib to bring some cold coffee for her friends, who were coming for a cards session.  The cards session, punctuated by gossip and chatter, carried on, but the coffee seemed to be taking too long. By now the players were getting impatient and the hostess was becoming a little embarrassed by the unusual delay. They could no longer wait for the cooling drink to soothe their heated nerves which were not so much the result of the hot summer afternoon but more of the heated arguments over cards. The memsahib, though sure of Manglu’s expertise, was now getting worked up. As she readied to leave to find out the reasons behind the delay, Manglu the Great entered with cups full of piping hot coffee with a little banana stuck into each cup.  He had brought 'Kol' coffee and the delay was because he had to get the bananas from the nearby Gola shop. 

(Kol means banana!)

After a formal dinner, the Visiting Agent looked around for a toothpick. The host immediately gave a signal to Manglu - his fingers touching his teeth - and waited. Manglu, with a very courteous, 'Ji Hazoor' went off, to appear only a few minutes later with a tray that contained a toothbrush, toothpaste and a bottle of Listerine and a hand towel hanging neatly over his left arm….

Yes, he had followed the sign language instructions to the best of his ability to provide the gentleman everything he would have required to clean his teeth.

In a bygone era, most of the tea plantation bungalows still had D.C (Direct Current supply). The refrigerators operated on kerosene lamps. The special bulbs provided such a dim light almost like that of a candle.   Notwithstanding all the handicaps, Sahibs enjoyed their little luxuries like a tub bath which the bearer had to get readied.

Then came the A.C. (Alternating Current). With the increased current, the dim lights brightened up. But not for Manglu, the bearer, who now wanted to leave and work in the garden, plucking leaves.

The reason was that now he had to prepare the bath tub ready first for the Sahib, then for Memsahib and then for Missy sahib, each time draining the used water, scrubbing the tub and filling it with fresh water. With better visibility now, he would be caught if he reused the same water for all three of them!

The Chhota Sahib came to act for the Manager who left to go on annual leave. With the perks came in the liabilities too, like taking care of cows and loving dogs. He found the little puppies very playful, but to make friends with them he had to know their names.

So Manglu was called. “What are the names of the two dogs?” he enquired.

Manglu in his incomprehensible garden dialect muttered 'Chip...and Mutton.'

Very funny thought the young man but then tea planters' whims and fancies are well known.

After a little reluctance for a few days, Chip and Mutton were responding to him. So it went on 'Chip, Mutton come here, Chip, Mutton sit down!'

Finally, leave over, the Manager arrives and to his horror, finds that his dogs have been rechristened - from 'Stitch' and 'Button' to 'Chip' and 'Mutton' and not only that, they were responding to those names!!

From Dr. S. Sarma -
Somra comes out of the doctor’s room looking worried.

Compounder Babu asks him, 'What happened?'

Somra replies, “Doctor Babu bolta hai hamara maikee ke chejereen (Caesarian) baccha hoga to babu kya woh indiaaan (Indian) nahi hoga? (Doctor says my wife will have to deliver a Ceasarian child, will he not be an Indian?)"

If these tickle your memory ….pen down your experiences with Manglu!!

Meet the writer: Shalini Mehra

I can neither boast of any career, nor of great feats; yes, a tag of gypsy is befitting as all through my life I have been wandering from one interest to another, returning home to one, then moving to new pastures. To use the cliché, I have been ‘Jack of all and Master of none’. The best part is that I have enjoyed the freedom of expressing myself through different mediums, be it music, dance, cooking, gardening, flower arranging or making dry flower frames, reading and writing. The last was always a moody muse till The Camellia happened.

During my wanderings I stumbled upon an idea when the new age of internet dawned upon the backwoods of the tea plantations. Life in tea has been unusual, very often bordering to inconceivable, and those real-life stories, so often almost fictional, needed to be told. The idea took a shape and thus the first ever Tea Planters’ Interclub magazine ‘The Camellia’, ‘for the planters, by the planters, of the planters’ was born in the sanctum sanctorum of my study. Thus, began the journey with pangs and pleasures of the birth and rearing up of my brainchild. If that can be called a milestone, it was surely one for me.

It makes me so proud that during this journey I made a lot of friends who shared my passion and extended their help. And Gowri Mohanakrishnan, moving with the times, took a step further and created ‘Indian Chai Stories’ - the tea stories blog. I extend my wholehearted support and best wishes to her.

Is this your first visit here? Welcome to Indian Chai Stories! Do you have a chai story of your own to share? Send it to me here, please : indianchaistories@gmail.com.

My name is Gowri Mohanakrishnan and I'm a tea planter's wife. I started this blog because one of the things that I wouldn't want us to lose in a fast changing world is the tea story - a story always told with great seriousness, no matter how funny - always true (always), maybe a tall tale, long, or short, impossible, scary, funny or exciting but never dull. 

Happy reading! Cheers to the spirit of Indian Tea!